Showing posts with label Values. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Values. Show all posts

Tuesday, July 14, 2015

A visit to SOSD Shelter

A cacophony of high pitched barks and whimpers greeted us as we stepped into the SOSD’s Shelter a few weeks back. The friendlier dogs were jumping while others (those on rehabilitation) were wary as we walked past. (We were told not to stick our fingers into the cages or stand too close to the gates.) The family was there that morning to understand a bit more of the work that SOSD does as we recently became a fosterer to a puppy which we picked up from SOSD.

They say that the eyes are windows to the souls and I can’t agree more. A walk through the shelter and you can sense the struggles and confusion some of these dogs have gone through.

 As we walked from pen to pen and peered into their eyes, each dog seems to have a story to tell.


Maddox (above) has a fantastic temperament. Rescued from AVA last year, Maddox has proven to be really gentle and friendly and he is now a regular fixture of SOSD’s outreach team. The team also brings him to schools to show the children just how friendly and gentle street dogs can be. Having done so much for educating the public and to give a “voice” on behalf of his other friends in the shelter, ironically he has remained, till this day, not adopted.


Beancurd (above left) was rescued in from AVA when she was just 3 months old and has since been waiting for a home.

Hers is a bittersweet story:  she was one of the few lucky ones that escaped unscathed when she was quarantined with a dog that later came down with the Pavorvirus. Though lively and loving, the irony is that she was the only one left of the whole batch to have yet found a home.  There were a few times where was nearly adopted, but it has not quite worked out.

And essentially that’s what SOSD aims to do – to give these dogs a second chance in life by rescuing these street dogs and educating the public. This is where a few of SOSD’s teams come into the picture with its re-homing team and the outreach team.

This tour we registered for started with a talk by Tony and Ashlee (below) who were our shelter tour guides that morning. Tours typically start at 1130am and because SOSD is managed by volunteers, so email confirmation may only be sent out 2 – 3 days prior to the tour. 

Above pic: Tony with Ashlee

While waiting, we saw volunteers taking the dogs out and walking them. Tony shared that the dogs are walked 4 times a week by volunteers who head to the shelters on weekdays too. 


Above: Moomi with her ‘handler’ for that morning. She is part of the Ubin Trap and Neuter project which you can more about here.) After the talk, we were brought into the shelter. 


Above: Inside Unit 15/16 (There are another 2 units 13/14 which we visited for a short while too)

The operating expenses to run a shelter are very high and the highest the shelter has ever incurred in a month is $30,000! That was for medical cost and includes vaccination and sterilization. Because of these high costs, money is spent carefully and repairs made, only when necessary. 


(Above pic: painting work done only on the lower half of the gate which comes into contact with the dogs to manage expenses)

From a parental standpoint, it was a really good exposure for Dumpling. She did not quite grasp what SOSD does and the scale of the work involved and the tour made it more ‘legit’. As Tony shared with us some of the dogs’ stories, I could see Dumpling ‘taking it all in’.  


I could also tell that Dumpling was really surprised at how “basic” the shelter is. At its best, the shelter is “functional” but of course that can’t be compared to the comfort that of a permanent / foster home. The shelter tour brought across a message that is certainly more concrete in the little one’s mind – Adopt, Don’t Shop

What I was happy to see was a dog run that is outside the shelter where the puppies and dogs have a chance to roam and run a bit. Additionally, it is also a ‘neutral’ meeting ground for a potential fosterer / adopter to meet and observe the new addition to the family. 


Above: SOSD’s dog run

It was an hour well spent for us and definitely for the kiddo. In fact, she was sharing with me that if there’s a chance, she would talk about the shelter visit and our fostering experience for her school’s “Show and Tell”.

As SOSD is a registered charity (founded in July 2011, it is funded solely by donations. Here’s some numbers and ways you can help:

(Information provided by SOSD Singapore)

SOSD does not attend to ad-hoc visits as based on my understanding; they are often busy over the weekends with adoption drives. If you should be keen to register your interest for the next shelter tour on 26 July, you can click here.

To understand more about the work and events that SOSD does, you can follow their Facebook page.

Disclaimer: This is neither a sponsored post nor were we compensated for it. All opinions expressed are entirely ours though the dogs that you see on their website and at the adoption drives can be yours. :) You can visit the adoption page here

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Tuesday, July 9, 2013

Parenting with Love - Values of humility

I am rubbing my tempers as I am typing this. Let's just say that through some circumstances Dumpling has been exposed to some degree of what I feel is some form of boasting and materialism which I do not feel comfortable about. She has been regurgitating stories about some money matters which I find a concern. A big enough of a concern for me to put up a shout on my personal Facebook last evening.


So here I am, faced with a double whammy, frightened as worried as hell that my daughter will grow up bratty (we are still working on her tone and manners) and even worse, have the wrong values inculcated. While I understand that most of us find joy in sharing good news but I also wish for more discretion when it comes to material stuff and money matters.

I am not anyone's example of a stellar Christian but I do have a very strong set of values and beliefs. Values are the hardest to teach and humility ranks high on that list for me. Whenever Dumpling or any of us, is blessed with something, I'd always give thanks to God and encourage her to do the same. After all, to me, what are given to us are all planned for and through the blessings of God - what is there for us to be so proud and boastful about? Especially when there are children involved and they are so young - is there a need to 'impress' these things upon them?

We read biblical stories and discuss verses from the bible as often as we can. I was so affected by what I heard last night that I spent an hour reading and discussing verses and parables with Dumpling. I do not want Dumpling to grow up thinking that money and all these riches on earth are what measures her success as a person and that is what she should strive for.

As a parent, I do not care if Dumpling were to grow up being a NASA Scientist or a top Neurosurgeon. Sure, if that is what she wants to do because she has interest and potential in that area, then by all means, she is free to pursue it. BUT. That would not make me any prouder than I already am. I will derive just as much happiness from watching her enjoy her life, her family and contributing to the workforce and society in any other way. I simply do not see myself as one parent who'd brag about her 'accomplishments' and go "You know, my daughter owns this large property in 6th avenue and brings home this amount of salary."

And so, here is an ending note which I want to leave for Dumpling, as a reminder, as a source of motivation and importantly, as a source of affirmation.

"Lulu, I am already proud as I can be of you and I will tell you this: I will be just as proud of you in 30 years even when I cannot see what lies ahead. 

This is because I believe in you. How successful you are as a person is not measured by how much you earn or what you own. It is beyond all these earthly riches but the heart of gold that lies in you. Continue to seek God when things are hard and give thanks when you receive any blessings.

For it is the riches in God's Kingdom that matter and one of these days, when I am gone, I will be right there in His Kingdom, waiting to enjoy those heavenly riches with you instead. I love you." 

Love, Mama Sue

Friday, May 17, 2013

VeggieTales Lapbook!

I chanced upon VeggieTales quite by 'accident' when Dumpling and I were at the library. I was captivated by the title and the illustration and took a second look. I then saw a post on A Journey Through Learning on the lapbooks that they created on VeggieTales titles and I decided to try it out. To my pleasant surprise, I actually enjoyed it as much as Dumpling!

The title which we picked up was titled Pistachio, the Boy that Woodn't. Dumpling was the first to notice that there was a pun on the word 'woodn't' and laughed about it. We played the DVD as soon as we can. The entire VeggieTales series is based on Christian faith but delivered through a cartoon format and importantly, children are engaged with familiar fairy tales / stories. In this title, it is a tweak of classic tale: Pinocchio.


There was corny humor in the show - Geppetto was renamed as Gelato and of course, Pinocchio as Pistachio. The story started with Gelato carved out a boy named Pistachio who took on the similar adventures as the classic story. But what I liked about the show are the catchy songs (some definitely corny) and the way the story was able to bring a certain biblical message down to a level where it is digestible. The DVD discussed 'obedience' and why we must 'Honour our Father and Mother' through the mishaps that Pistachio faced along the way.

The lapbook elements consisted of pockets of activities around character and traits discussion...


(Overview of some of the activities from the lapbook)

We also had a chance to discuss about the role of parents in Dumpling's life and the lessons which we have taught her. It was a very interesting and enlightening session for me just to hear it from Dumpling's perspective!

Dumpling giving it some serious thoughts before replying and discussing her views 
with me...

And then writing it out... 

Having a think about Gelato and his role in the show and in Pistachio's life... 


We then did some verse reading and discussed the commandment below


Included in the printables pack was a parable told by Gelato which is turned into a sequencing exercise


There are a few more activities from the printables pack which I did not include in this post. Here's a trailer on Pistachio to share:


Interestingly, the DVD did not touch on being truthful which to me, is one of the most obvious topics of discussions. Having said that, Dumpling enjoyed the story and I like that the DVD and the lapbook provided me with a chance to discuss values in an applicable and more importantly, a lighthearted manner with Dumpling. As I am not very much into TV time so we took the opportunity to revisit and read the classic Pinocchio too. We have since there reserved 3 more titles from the library so no prizes for the right guesses as to what we will be doing over the next few weeks. :) 

Wednesday, December 26, 2012

A day of Kindness

For the month of December, one of the things I wanted to do was a simple “pay-it-forward” kind of idea. I ended up being busy with Advent Activities and did not manage to carry through the "pay-it-forward" intention. Then a fellow blogger mummy Dee Loh reached out in her Spread the Kindness linky where blogger mums can share their “kindness stories”.

When I first read other inspiring stories from mummies such as Angeline Sim who helped out in a community project with her little girl Dana and another kind hearted mummy who even helped to clean an elderly’s house, I was atad intimidated. I mean wow, these mummies mean serious business!

So I was stuck. For many days. Because I seriously did not know what to share and what to blog about. After mulling over it for a few days, it suddenly came to me that I was being ridiculous! Surely (I told myself) spreading kindness need not be this hard or elaborate! I am sure many of us do pockets of kind acts in one way. 

With that, I decided to share “A Day of Kindness” with all of you, where small little acts will also bring a smile to someone’s face. :)

9am:
Waiting for an appointment and I was early so I headed to the supermarket to buy a drink. An elderly man needed help to read off a label on a box of sparkling grape juice (he was illiterate in English). Camera shy, he waved his hand when I whipped out my trusty iPhone. Though no photos, his grateful smile is enough to warm me up. (I am smiling as I am typing this)



11am: 
I held a door open for a few delivery guys

1:30pm:
I treated a fellow colleague to a cup of teh tarek! Here's Tini with her Cheshire-happy-with-my-teh-tarek-smile!




3:20pm:
Gave a colleague a lift to a new office site

7:00pm:
Wrapped all the Christmas presents for Dumpling’s teachers which she gave out the next day

(photo taken on the following day)

9:30pm:
Handed our helper her Christmas present


Though it was not in anyway "big", but the small gestures and thoughts do add up as my day was simply warmer with their smiles. :) 

Thank you Dee, for starting off this initiative!

Thursday, June 28, 2012

Is Gaming All Bad 2

Continuation:

Inspired by how playing boardgames can truly let one learn through play, Pamela Tan started an online store at www.MyFirstGames.sg to retail and distribute the games which she mostly imports from US and Europe.

In the first instalment, I reached out to Pamela to discuss if Gaming is all bad. Here’s part 2 of our chat:


Me: What are the other “lessons of life” can one take away from Board Games?

Pam: Other than those listed earlier, my children have benefitted from the below:
Taking instructions. Board games are excellent for training children to listen to instructions and carrying out the instructions correctly. I started playing Go Away Monster (a board game meant for ages 3 and up) with Isaac since he was 17 months old. By 18 months, he could play the game with its full rules – he could understand the instructions I gave him and he executed them perfectly.


• Taking turns. With the same game, Go Away Monster, Isaac learnt how to take turns, and wait for his turn, at 18 months. Our paediatrician says this is unheard of in an 18 month old. Apparently it is normal for a child in their earlier years to always think and want it to be their turn ALWAYS. This is normal and common. But it just shows, that with some conditioning, it is possible to teach children from a young age to learn how to take turns.


• Cultivating of patience. Now that I have two younger children, we have had to bring back the games that Isaac played with when he was 2 years old to play them with his younger brother Asher, and sister Shawna. Now at 5 years old, Isaac would prefer to play more challenging games, but gets frustrated when he has to play simple games (such as Go Away Monster which he mastered earlier on) and he does not like it when the twins mess up his game or if they do not know how to play his game. This is where we teach him to be patient with the twins. We remind him that he was once a 2 year-old who played Go Away Monster seven times a day, and that he too, had to be taught how to play the game by its rules.


Developing leadership. Now that my message to Isaac to be patient with his siblings has sunk in, he has started to teach them how to play the games, by himself. He will aid me in trying to teach and guide the twins during game play.


Encouraging perseverance. “Try, and try again.” is our mantra that I teach Isaac when he does not win a game.


• Developing a strategy. Even in games for young kids, you can employ different strategies to win. After the child learns how to play the game, you can teach him how to strategise. Get him to consider different methods to win. Teach him to learn how to think ahead and anticipate their opponents’ moves. Encourage him to experiment with different tactics and strategies and techniques, to see what works and what does not. Let him practice and train him to think of all possible options and explore where those options lead him.


Read body language. Improve Negotiation skills. Foster co-operation. There are all sorts of games out there. Some games which require reading of body language of that of your opponents, some require you to negotiate with your opponents while for others, you will need to co-operate with your fellow game players to work together to win the game together. As Isaac grows older, we look forward to being able to introduce him to more complex games.

Laid out above is all the stuff you can teach your child while playing board games with him/her, and I did not even list the ‘obvious’ stuff that you can learn from board games that some parents only look for, like Maths, and Language (vocabulary, spelling etc), and themes touching on Science, History, Geography… To me, this is the surface learning which is used to reinforce what the kids learn in school. However, I feel that the true value of board games is in the abstract learning that is gleaned from parents playing with their children.



Me: Lastly, what games would you recommend for the preschoolers?


Pam: There are certainly loads to choose from and I will list the ones which are popular with our customers as well as my children.

Below 3 years old• Go Away, Monster! http://www.myfirstgames.sg/go-away-monster.html
• Froggy Boogie http://www.myfirstgames.sg/froggy-boogie.html
• Kleiner Teddy (Little Teddy) http://www.myfirstgames.sg/kleiner-teddy.html


3 to below 5
• Duck Duck Bruce http://www.myfirstgames.sg/duck-duck-bruce.html
• Viva Topo http://www.myfirstgames.sg/viva-topo.html
• Zoowaboo http://www.myfirstgames.sg/zoowaboo.html

 5 and above
• Sleeping Queens http://www.myfirstgames.sg/sleeping-queens.html
• Super Circles http://www.myfirstgames.sg/super-circles.html
• Quoridor Kid http://www.myfirstgames.sg/pirate-versus-pirate.html
• Pirate versus Pirate http://www.myfirstgames.sg/pirate-versus-pirate.html

Many of the games listed above are also good with older kids, right up to teens and even adults. (For e.g. games such as Quoridor Kid and Pirate versus Pirate).



Pamela Tan is a board games enthusiast with a personal collection of more than 300 board games. She is a mother of three young children, the oldest turning 5 years old this year. Initially starting out with the intention to train her children to play strategy boardgames with her in future, she found that boardgames are an excellent educational tool when she started playing them with her son and went on to start up her own online games store: www.MyFirstGames.sg!

Pamela blogs about her parenting thoughts and journey regularly at http://tanfamilychronicles.blogspot.sg/ /From now till 31 July, readers who quote "SMB-BEANIENUS" will receive a 10% off your purchases (not applicable on delivery and shipping)



Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Is Gaming All Bad?

In recent years, “Gaming” is almost deemed as a dirty word as parents are concerned with the time that their children spend on games. So is “gaming” all that bad for kids? Are there any merits to “gaming” at all?

In this guest post, I reached out to Pamela Tan, mother of 3 preschoolers and founder of MyFirstGames. Here's part 1 of our chat. :)


Me: Pamela, how did you start on Gaming?

Pam: I first started out being a board game enthusiast 12 years back and I would play them with friends, my then-boyfriend who later became my husband. No surprises that one of our hobbies was and still is playing board games. After I became a mother, I enthusiastically searched out games that were suitable for young children and would play them with my son, my nieces, and now my two youngest children too.

Some parents react negatively when they hear the word “gaming” as they associate “gaming” with “computer games” and as such, all forms of games are bad. However, “gaming” in its traditional form of board games, can be beneficial.





Me: When is Gaming bad?

Pam: Gaming is bad when it turns into an obsession. When the individual (the child or the adult) is so obsessed with gaming to the point that he skips meals, does not bother with personal hygiene (does not brush teeth, bathe etc), does not want to go to school/work and does not even want to talk to anyone face-to-face.

Gaming is bad when it isolates the individual as a result of zero social interaction whilst gaming. This is especially apparent in computer gaming. Whilst it is true that some computer games are played against “human” opponents, most of these opponents are either seated opposite the room, on the other side of the country, or on the flip side of the globe. There is also minimal communication between the opponents during the game. Hence, for all intents and purposes, there is little or no social interaction during playing of computer games.

In this day and age of technological advancement where phones have games, iPads are commonplace, and television sets have never been cheaper, it is no wonder that these gadgets have been harnessed (using appropriate applications and programmes) and turned into nannies for children. As it is, we are already moving towards the day when all the textbooks in schools would be replaced with a slim touch screen tablet computer.

Given how quickly children can get the hang of using such gadgets, it is really not necessary to start them on it at such a young age. In fact, in view of this state of affairs and what we are moving towards, it is all the more important that children be exposed to as much human-to-human interaction as possible.

Therein lies the main difference between computer games and board games and the best reason why board games are better and more preferable to computer games.





Me: When and how is Gaming good?

Pam: One of the biggest disadvantages to playing board games is that you need to find someone to play them with. But this is also its biggest advantage, for by playing a board game with another person, there is face-to-face interaction with another person. This is fantastic for parent-child bonding. I love playing games with my children. We get to spend time with each other. I get to analyze my child to see what his temperaments are, to observe how he reacts to different situations, to teach him and see him learn, understand, and grow. It is a very satisfying experience. And when it is just the kids playing the games on their own, the lessons I have taught my children get put to the test.




With your guidance, let your child learn the lessons of life while they play board games with you. Here is a sampling of what I have taught my son, Isaac:


• It’s a dog eat dog world out there.
Everyone wants to win. Everyone plays to win. “Isaac, there is no such thing as “Mummy should let you win.” Because Mummy wants to win too.”


• Channel the child’s energies toward positive avenues.
“Isaac, if you want to win, then you should work towards winning. Perhaps you have to pay more attention to the game, or use a better strategy or technique, or maybe you simply need to persevere and practice more often. Just try, and try again. So, rather than throw tantrums, you should spend your time and energy towards doing all these things, to work towards winning. No use wasting your time and energy crying.”


• In life, sometimes you win, sometimes you lose.
There are some games out there, where, no matter how good the strategy or technique you employ, you may still lose. This is very true for games which are based on chances – where dice throws determines pretty much everything (a good example is Snake & Ladders). Isaac would get dejected and frustrated because no matter what he does, he cannot control whether he wins or not, in that particular game. I would talk to him, and tell him that games are like that, sometimes you win, and sometimes you lose… which leads us to…


• Winning is not everything.
That there are more important things in life than “winning everything” (Isaac has started to compete with his brother and sister in everything a la “I finish drinking my milk the fastest!” and “I press for the lift first!”). “Isaac, winning is not everything. When you play games, it is more important to have fun. Are you having fun? Yes? Then you’re a winner already. We play games to have fun together. What’s the point in winning if you end up not having fun?”


• Be gracious.
When you lose, lose graciously. Everyone knows to teach that with playing games. No throwing tantrums, no crying. Teach the child to channel his “fear of losing” or “want to win” to positive actions like trying harder etc, as mentioned above. However, just as important, is to teach the child to win graciously. No taunting opponents about their loss. No “neh-neh-ni-boo-boo”s. No sticking out tongues and blowing raspberries.


• Have integrity. Be honest.
When you play board games, there is actually a lot of opportunity to cheat, if your opponents are not paying attention. You can take more resources than you are supposed to, go an extra turn if no one is looking… etc. Teach that it is important to be honest to oneself. So what if you win the game if you did it through dishonest means? Even if none of your opponents have found out that you cheated, YOU know. How does it make you feel if you know that you did not win the game honestly? Not good.


• Take responsibility for your own actions.
 In games, in life, you can make choices. You can choose whatever you want to (within confines of the game rules), but for whichever choice or decision you make you take responsibility for it, you bear the consequences. “Isaac, why are you crying? Because the cat ate your mice? But just now you chose to move your mice straight instead of going into the hole to take cheese and stay safe, right? So that is the choice you make, and the consequence is that the cat ate up the mice still in the race. Don’t cry. Learn from this. So maybe next time, you may want some of your mice to move into the hole, take cheese, and be safe. Alright? No use crying over dead mice.”


• Play by the rules.
Playing a board game is very much like life, in which, there are rules. You cannot do anything you like simply because you “feel like it”. You have to learn to play by the rules, and do the best you can with whatever resources you have. You can be creative and think out of the box, so long as you do not cross the lines and break any rules. Board games have rules, but there is sometimes grey areas it is not certain if something can be done; rules are silent. When Isaac comes up with a strategy or technique to win which is not prohibited in the rules that were laid out, I will allow him to win. Sometimes, especially when learning a new game, or if the child is very young, they may want to play the game “their own way”. This is fine in the beginning, so long as the child knows that this is not the proper way to play the game by the rules. Sometimes Isaac just wants to play it a certain way, that he knows makes it easier for him to win. I will tell him “Okay, just this once. But you know this is not playing by the rules, right? Because if you play this game with other people, everyone will play by the rules. If you don’t want to play by the rules, no one would want to play with you.”


Pamela Tan is a board games enthusiast with a personal collection of more than 300 board games. She is a mother of three young children, the oldest turning 5 years old this year. Initially starting out with the intention to train her children to play strategy boardgames with her in future, she found that boardgames are an excellent educational tool when she started playing them with her son and went on to start up her own online games store: www.MyFirstGames.sg!

Pamela blogs about her parenting thoughts and journey regularly at http://tanfamilychronicles.blogspot.sg/


From now till 31 July, readers who quote "SMB-BEANIENUS" will receive a 10% off your purchases. (Does not apply on delivery / shipping)

Friday, April 27, 2012

Kindness begins at... home

Part of my decision to homeschool Dumpling stems from the belief that good habits and values begin from home. That was what we have been focusing from home for a while but it was only from the beginning of the year that I had more of a structure around it. 


For the past month, "Kindness" has been our theme. "Kindness" not only in thoughts but (and by now, she is able to recite with me) in words and actions too. :p




What I'd do is to read some biblical stories and verses with her along with other books and in this case, a DVD which I borrowed from the library.





And like all our themes, we had a field trip! Guess where we headed off to last Sunday?


:) 






:):)








:):):)





:):):):)










hehe... the SPCA!


We had a really good time there. Dumpling asked a lot of questions:
- what is a pet shelter and what does it do
- why and how do people become volunteers
- why were the animals abandoned
- what is a stray (and we used the opportunity to explain to her "domesticated' animals / pets)


It was also the perfect platform for us then to explain the concept of responsibility in addition to "kindness" towards not just people but animals too. 




We pointed out these bio data sheets to Dumpling...



And were captivated by this pair of soulful eyes! Seriously, can you not melt? 



Dumpling's photography skills have improved tremendously. I will update this post with a pic that she took of the place over the next day or two :)



We are also very proud that she has confidence to enter into the Kennel and is not "iffy" about fur and all and is gentle in handling them (of course we were mindful to choose the friendlier few) :)




Then we went into the small animals area and lost our hearts to this kitten: Becca. She has the sweetest temperament and is really good with young children. I carried her for a good 10 mins as Dumpling stroked and played with her



When one friendly paw is not enough. :) (from 2 different cats)


We also took the chance to have a chat with some of the volunteers who were ever so patient with Dumpling's questions about the animals and their voluntary work. The 1.5 hours zoomed by in a flash. 

Dumpling has been asking if we could visit the place again ever since. We did speak about volunteering our time at the SPCA in future too. :) That reminds me - I will have to give them a call to ask about the "starting" age for volunteers. lol

Friday, April 13, 2012

As good as it gets

Amongst my many challenges as a homeschooling mum is that everyone has 101 suggestions / "advice". From the "take it from me, I have been there before..." (well, it would make sense if our situations are totally alike) to "it is pronounced as Van Gorrr not Van Goe".

There were also some instances when I'd end up debating with some over "spelling" and "grammar", etc. "Leaped" versus "Leapt" ("leaped is so totally wrong!" - well it isn't, just that British favours "leapt" more), the role o f silent "e", etc.

It does get very tiring at times at best and at the worst, it is downright infuriating because some of these people would totally not be receptive to ideas and opinions and think that only their views are right and they do not need to learn anything new.



This essentially is one of the many values I try to teach Dumpling - to be teachable i.e. humble. For Dumpling, she sometimes gets very bossy and argumentative. She'd argue that she is right and everyone else is wrong. I am still trying to to unteach that.

For we can only be as good as we can get if we were to be locked within our own world. If one is unteachable and thinks that his / her view is the best, then to me, the person is and will forever remain stagnant. This applies not only to Dumpling but also to myself. Though trying, I always take a step back and try to be receptive to new ideas / thoughts as I'd remind myself that I do not have all the answers. It is good to always have a healthy dose of information from someone else as well as to have a robust exchange of ideas so that we can better ourselves.

With this belief, I ended up creating a group on Facebook which is one of the best things that I have ever done for myself and I hope, for many members. The wealth of information in the exchanges is just tremendous. Being in Kiasu Singapore, some have asked me why I am so open to exchanges of resources, etc. My answer to that is there is only 1 of me and 24 hours daily. If we have an open exchange of ideas, thoughts and sharing of resources, it saves so much time for everyone. And of course, I choose to trust the better side of humans where the information/sharing is not being abused.

Because of this belief and group, I learnt a lot too; from ex teachers to early childhood educators to professional storyteller to facebook webstore books sellers, the expertise and opinions shared is mind boggling. So to all of you, thank you. :) (Edit: gonna claim bragging rights here by staking claim to say that we form this Facebook homeschool/homelearning community first! lol)

Wherein humility, I learn. Wherein sharing, I receive. Wherein giving, I am blessed. Many many times over. :)

Thursday, March 29, 2012

Think about it

My mum-in-law and I had an interesting conversation a few days back about homeschooling and being unsocialised.


That is the most common concern that I hear from other parents. Homeschooling = unsocialised.





While I understand the concern about the lack of “interaction”, let me debunk a few myths. While I homeschool Dumpling on the homefront for all other disciplines, she attends Chinese classes daily. So, I am not entirely fully homeschooling in this sense. But I liken myself to other homeschooolers who hire tutors for "help". :)


There is a world of difference between “unsociable” and “unsocialized”. Think about it.


Whether a child is “friendly” is dependent on a lot of factors including the child’s personality, the environment, etc. Being unsocialised assumes that the child is not exposed to "people" and the "world". But for me, I believe homeschooled children have tons more “free” exposure. I know many homeschoolers incorporate life skills in "educating" their children. This includes bringing the child(ren) to run daily errands such as grocery shopping, post office (for those who run a webstore), take the public transport, etc.


In these instances, the child gets to interact with the “real” world – interacting with the stall holders on vegetables and meat selection, handling “change” and money from the purchase, understanding units of measurement from mailing out parcels at the post office, occupation from public transport, etc.


Now, tell me, how many “socialised” school children get such “real life” exposure on a weekly, let alone daily basis. Add that to the fairs, sports meet and weekly gatherings these homeschoolers organise with many involving their children in the planning of such. (I use “them” here because I am a FTWM and hence, I have not participated in any of these events.)


So, think about it. What are the children who are attending a formal public / private school “exposed” to then?


I was at the playground with Dumpling over weekend and 3 young boys later joined in. These boys do not look to be older than 10 years old. Dumpling was blocked by one of these boys at one stage and she said “excuse me” very politely. The boy turned around and saw that it was “just us” – a mum and a young child and out came this string of Hokkien vulgarity asking about my “mum”.


Thank goodness Dumpling does not understand Hokkien and I herded her away though I had this strong urge to dump a bottle of Dettol down his throat (not very kind, I know). This prompted me to think, what would one be exposing his/her child to in a school environment?


I know many would jump in at this point in time to say “Well, that is the real world. So how long do you intend to “cushion” your child from such things?”


My answer to that is, before my child is even exposed to such things, what are the core values I am exposing to my child as a parent to equip her to deal with such incidents?


That essentially is a big part for many homeschooling parents – academic is secondary to faith and values. For me, I personally feel that if Dumpling and I were to focus on the last 2, I would think, my role as a parent is done. Think about it.


If we as parents guide them along properly and instill quality values, even when faced with such incidents, I believe our children will not be provoked or led onto a wrong path. I also pray that she will have kindness and gentleness in her thoughts, action and words.


That part, for Dumpling and I, will form an important part of our homeschooling foundation. For the rest, I can only let go, pray and trust.


Think about it.



Think about it
 1 Corinthians 13:4-5


Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful.
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